Last day in China

Today I'll be flying back to Hong Kong, done most of the packing, just some final last minute small things to be put in the bag and I am ready to go.

Last night dinner at youngest aunt was nice. We had Peking duck :) yummy. Not much chance of eating that in Hong Kong (without having to pay a fortune anyway). I shall miss all the vegetables here and mom's fish. I don't think I can cook the way she does. If I smell any fish, I can't eat it :(

I already started missing mom. Not the food she cooked, but missing her annoying reminders at times, missing her attention on me, missing her silly remarks (Iuse to think anyway until we are apart) about things, missing her telling me to watch out on the road ( again and again, even though I heard her the first time), missing her holding onto me walking on the road even thogh it's perfectly flat and smooth, missing her turning round and check if my shoulders, tummy and feet are well covered, missing her moaning about things I did wrong. All these one can't buy with money. And usually when you are living with them, you might find it annoying and silly and irritating at times. However when you are apart. These 'annoying things' become so valuable, something to miss the most. Well of course I'll miss mom's food as well, but the most I'lll miss is not having to worry about my meal. One will never realize that and take it for granted at the time, it only gets manified when they are gone.

I have to say my mom is 100 times stronger a woman than I am and ever will be ( I hope I'll be as strong as she is when I get to her age). She'll say things that people might get annoyed at and yet if it's out of good intention and that she believes it's good, she'll still say it putting herself at risk of people not liking her. Nowadays not many people out there will do. Most of them tend to choose the easy way out and trying to please everyone. But is it real 'please'? Or is it just 'can't be bothered' attitude. I think if I were her, I would have collasped long time ago. I admire her strong will, I admire her simple mind, I admire her unconditional love to serve.

Last night, mom had yet another leg cramp, she screams so loud it must have hurt a lot. I sat up instantly and rubbed her leg using all my strength. This morning it still hurt, I had leg cramp before, it usually takes about 2 days at least to recover...Mom walks and stands a lot during the day, guess that didn't help. We thought it's because she's lack of calcicum, however she's taken 2 bottles of calcium tablets. But doesn't seem to work. Maybe it could be these two weeks, me being here and she's walking and standing around even more...

Looking at myself in the mirror, already tearing up writing this, is it a good trait or a sign of weakness? I just know I couldn't help. I tired to tell myself to be strong and smile but it proves to be very difficult. I am sure xiaobao feels it too, he didn't move since, sitting quietly in there listening...

I'll try to get youngest aunt to go with us to the airport, so that mom won't have to go back by herself....

Let's not end this entry with teary thoughts. I know hubby will be happily waiting for me and xiaobao's return on the other side. We both miss him a lot! Muah! And let's say xiaobao's first trip outside HK has been successful and enjoyable! :) Next time he'll see it for himself! :D

I think I'll sleep well tonight ...